Engayment.org

Recently, my boyfriend Kyle and I got commitment rings. We can’t get engaged because it’s not legal to get Married. Getting engaged when you can’t get married seems kinda pointless right? I compare it to buying pet food and a dog collar for the pet dog you really want to get when you know you can’t get a dog because your apartment has a no pets allowed policy. So we got ‘comitted’ and my family and friends were very supportive and sent numerous congratulatory messages. “Congratulations, about time!” That kind thing. Very lovely. But we became quite confused about it all.

Why were we being congratulated? We weren’t engaged? We weren’t anything. We were just agreeing to commit to each other and get rings to symbolise it, which seemed almost pointless because we’ve been together for 2 years, committed the whole time. 

My grandmother called Kyle on the phone to welcome him to the family, which was just lovely, but also confusing. Kyle has been part of the family for two years?

Engagement seems like something worth receiving congratulations over. Commitment is not the same.

I tried to explain to my family that we are not engaged, we are just committed, and they all uttered similar words, “Oh, if you love each other, it’s the same thing!”

BEEEEEEP – WRONG!

It is NOT the same thing. Engagement is what you do when you’re getting MARRIED, which we cannot do.

Because people believe commitment is the same, nothing ever changes. Because gay people overwhelmingly accept the support offered from their family and friends when they say “Congratulations on getting committed! It’s the same thing as marriage!”,  No one gets angry enough to actually do something about it. No one unifies. No one rallies. No one complains to government in large numbers.

Well, I’m angry! I’m angry that when we went shopping for rings, I had to tell the store sales clerk that we were looking for Engayment rings.

Imagine if we lived in country where White people could get married, but Black people couldn’t. The riots that would ensue! People would be screaming to end the human rights violation! People would unify, black and white behind the cause and they would end up toppling the regime that enforced the senseless bigotry.

The Australian Government allowed Kyle to immigrate to this country because he was my partner. They accept his partnership with me as one of significant importance. The fact we are together and have been together for 2 years allows him to benefit from Australian medicare, health care, superannuation, HECS, tax incentives, you name it. But NOT Marriage. But in the eyes of the very government that extends him all of his rights, we are not to be married. Not now. Not ever!

So I want to know who makes these decisions. I want to know what their excuses are for such blatant discrimination. I want to know who they are. I want their decisions to be a matter of record, for all to see.

This blog will document my journey as I challenge the Australian Government to come up with some meaningful answers to the discrimination  many hundreds of thousands of Australian’s must face because of their sexuality). Please feel free to subscribe and show your support.

Engayment is not the same as Engagement and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

We should all be treated the same and until we are, get off your bum and do something about it!

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